[Bucky hesitates for a moment at the not-question. Flashes of that night play before he can stop them. Sitting at the register in the pet store, looking up at the chime, and Sam's memories fill in the blanks. A gun pressed against Bucky's head, the lights go out, and Bucky kills two of the would-be-robbers before he turns on Sam. Bucky's own memories come back after that, when he wakes up in a halo of glass with a pounding headache, shouting at Sam about the promise--- the promise he kept from Steve he's remembering now. Next time is the last time. How Bucky planned on never hurting another innocent bystander and the bone-deep grief that spilled out of him when it did happen again without the end he expected.
Not really 'welcome back buddy' stuff.
Bucky tries to withdraw, to tuck it all back in, but he's already let too much of it through. He and Sam shouted and screamed at each other before Bucky ran. Then there were days of locking himself away, rationing his food to keep himself from needing to go out into crowds.
An attempt to say no to Sam resulted in the programming burning Bucky from the inside out. He's not supposed to be able to do that. Sam carried him to a hotel room, let Bucky crawl into his head while waiting out HYDRA's latent defenses against an insubordinate soldier, and then they had a long conversation about the symbiote, about Bucky's apparent powers that set off the Soldier.]
no subject
Not really 'welcome back buddy' stuff.
Bucky tries to withdraw, to tuck it all back in, but he's already let too much of it through. He and Sam shouted and screamed at each other before Bucky ran. Then there were days of locking himself away, rationing his food to keep himself from needing to go out into crowds.
An attempt to say no to Sam resulted in the programming burning Bucky from the inside out. He's not supposed to be able to do that. Sam carried him to a hotel room, let Bucky crawl into his head while waiting out HYDRA's latent defenses against an insubordinate soldier, and then they had a long conversation about the symbiote, about Bucky's apparent powers that set off the Soldier.]